Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion.
The problem is, when it gets out of the range of your control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems:
- It cause ruptures in relationships (partner threatening to leave you)
- Over doing anger could cause you to lose your job
- You could be at risk of getting a criminal record
- Out of control anger can even be life threatening.
Short Video on Anger Management
The techniques to reduce your emotional feelings, and the physiological response, that anger causes
Maybe you can’t eliminate those situations, people, or thoughts that enrage you but you can learn to control your response to them
Anger management consists of having individual sessions to gain understanding of your triggers and gaining techniques to reduce your response that anger causes.
We can discuss your unique situations and circumstances and find new types of behaviour and reactions for whenever you encounter anger in the future.
Where, in the past, you might have reacted aggressively to situations, we find a new positive approach.
You don’t have to compromise yourself or just keep quiet.
We discover ways that you can still take account of your own feelings and needs – but, instead of allowing an explosion of anger, react calmly instead and get positive solution to situations.
Remember, authentic anger (as an emotion) does serve a purpose (it allows you to know that you feel annoyed). But acting out that anger harms you and / or other people.
So, in anger management sessions, we are working to respond to the excessive or unhealthy demonstrations of anger, so that you avoid nasty consequences in your life.
I used to think I would be all right if I could just stay calm all of the time.
But now I know it’s unrealistic to expect to go through life without things annoying you.
It’s about how you deal with that feeling of annoyance which makes all the difference to whether you get a good outcome or a disastrous one.
What I learned in the sessions was how to get the good outcome.
Before it was normal to go from simmering to boiling in 60 seconds, but now I notice my identifiers and I take that as my warning to calm down and then I use the techniques I learned to stay calm.
Talking to Vauna in the first session – I felt at ease because she knew what she was talking about and I could see she could help.
Before I had the sessions I was sceptical about how they would work or whether they would work – I was surprised that even after the first session there was a change in me.
Also, I wanted to do something about it – that gave me the power to go out and achieve it and make this better.
If I didn’t really want to change then I would have come to the sessions and not taken it in.
Wanting to change is a big part of it and that’s how I did it.
Before the anger management sessions I couldn’t think about anything when I was angry. I would just go straight to getting angry and I was messing up my life.
Now I handle situations the right way.
Because of what I have learned in the sessions with Vauna I can give myself time to think about the situation. And that time to think makes all the difference.
With all that we talked about, I got a great understanding of the sensitive situations I find myself in and Vauna helped me to work out what was important to me, and what else to consider when choosing how to respond.
I think I was quite a difficult case, and I never thought doing anger management would make any difference. BUT I am so surprised at how I have just turned my whole life around.
I had my sessions on my laptop, using Skype. It was very easy.
I was relieved to find out that it wasnt all just me.
What i learned in the anger management sessions was how we misunderstood each other – and BOTH of us got it wrong.
I wrote it down and took the notes home to share with my partner and we started to talk about it.
I was glad when she volunteered to own up to her side of the mistake.
The fact that we are able to talk, really talk to each other – about things means we can now get on again and when it gets argumentative we can talk about it.
Its a big relief.
I never had anger issues until 4 to 5 years ago.
Now I lose it over the smallest things and it causes trouble between me and others.
I’ve been wanting to do anger management for a while, now.
But recently I have been falling out with my boyfriend and I can’t control myself, so I have had no choice but to come to the sessions.
I sound angry even when I don’t want to be.
I have had two sessions and already I can think about things and let myself sound calm and then he doesnt get defensive and we don’t end up in a fight.
It’s the fights he said he hated and I know he would have left me if we didn’t stop, because he said he wasn’t standing for it anymore.
After the anger management sessions I act like there is no point in getting angry over the small things.
My relationships are better – my family and friends and my girlfriend.
Doing the anger management sessions has made my life better and easier.
The anger management sessions with Vauna were easy to do and just felt like average conversations.
I learned a lot in half a dozen sessions.
In my everyday life I have noticed a real change, and so has my wife and children.
It’s a weight off my shoulders because I never thought I would be able to solve it.
I thought she would end up divorcing me, like she said she would, and I would end up living without seeing my children everyday.
And now it is all resolved, there is no chance of the family being split up.
It was a close call.
Before the anger management sessions I never thought it would be possible to be able to choose how I react, because it all just happened so quickly – I used to just see red and then afterwards would know what had gone wrong.
Even now there are times I could lose my cool, but I don’t let myself because after sorting this out I am never going back to how I was. – I say to myself, “Don’t go there. Don’t go back to that point after all you’ve done”.
When you get into angry states you feel you are the only one.
I looked on the internet and saw all these courses and sessions, and I thought, “If there is all that help online, then it must be because people need it, so I can’t be the only one”.
Realising that made me stop thinking embarrassed about it, and I just picked up the phone and booked in with Vauna.
For all you other women out there, I would say, “don’t think anger management is just for young guys, there are loads of people who need help with realising how they get out of hand.
– Go for anger management sessions and get it sorted out.
Your life will finally sort itself out and it will be the best thing you ever did”.